Remembering Alice Wong

Sandy Ho: This was about 15 years ago, and I, at the time, was a program manager for a mentoring program that supports young women with disabilities to be mentored by older disabled women in the community. And at the time, I, myself, was in search of other Asian American women with disabilities, and didn't have a ton of folks who looked like me, and were living disabled lives in the world, and doing the kinds of work that I was interested in, which was really community organizing and sharing stories.

Sandy discovered Alice's letter to her younger self on Tumblr and reached out to share it with her mentoring program. 

We got on a Skype call, because that was what we used back then, and then we became fast friends... I was prepared to get on that Skype call to talk about, like, ‘Oh, this is what I do with the program and the work.’ And instead, she wanted to talk about who I am. She asked me a lot about food and if our family spoke Cantonese. That was just the kind of person that she always was.

Ryan Easterly: Like many folks with disabilities, I knew of Alice's work in advocacy before actually meeting her, especially her work with Crip the Vote and her advocacy for people with disabilities voting. The first time we met in person was when I moved to the Bay Area. I was being recruited to join the board of the WITH Foundation (Opens in a new tab), where Alice already served. She met with me to talk about her experience on the board and why she thought I should join.

We became very good friends. Alice, along with another dear friend of mine, Stacey Milbern, and I became what Alice coined "The Three Musketeers" because we all served on the WITH Foundation board together. They were some of the earliest supporters when I decided to transition from board member to executive director.

As Executive Director of the Disability and Philanthropy Forum (Opens in a new tab), Sandy holds the philanthropy sector accountable to disability rights and justice.

Sandy Ho: Alice's activism and advocacy through disability justice was really the way that she approached storytelling. And she was always so incredible at asking the right questions that really got the person talking and even rethinking the ways in which we connect ourselves to community and have commonalities and experiences as disabled people.

She really got to the heart of what it takes for people with disabilities to live in their own communities, in settings they choose, and to make basic decisions—like going out with friends or having dinner. She was an incredible person who brought together communities far beyond the disability community, and that is the true power of her storytelling.

Ryan Easterly: Alice had a commitment to allowing everyone their space and telling stories in the way they choose. She was very mindful that everyone should have a platform... She didn't shy away from acknowledging that when you're of a different race, that can impact whether or not you have a platform or an opportunity to tell your story.

She was always questioning who else should be at the table, who else should be telling their stories. She constantly found ways to help folks share their experiences and connect them with others who could amplify their work. Alice loved to make introductions — if you got an introduction from her, it was always someone good, someone you should know, someone you should help. In addition to really helping the work, it brought her a great amount of joy to do that.

Sandy Ho: Access Is Love came together in 2018 when Alice, Mia Mingus, and I reimagined what accessibility could mean. The three of us really thought about the ways that events at the time [pre-pandemic] … were not accessible or came about access in ways that were just about the standard kind of ADA compliance.

Access is not just about compliance and regulation; it is about how we show up to belong, to be seen, and to be held by one another. We just want to be able to show up and be present and not have to justify our needs.

Ryan Easterly: I think Alice probably saw a vision for me before I did. She was very supportive, and in our conversations, she would tell me, ‘No, you can do this, and not only that, this is another way to advance the work.’ When she eventually became vice president of our board, she enabled me to be my full self as a leader. 

Alice was just a great person. She could always be relied on to check if you were eating and offer you food. We would have a friendly clash between Asian culture and Southern culture, trying to figure out who was going to be more hospitable. In addition to appreciating good food, I also appreciated her wit. We would talk about trashy TV shows together—the reboot of "Dynasty" really brought us together, and we were rewatching "Beauty in Black" when she passed. We were both night owls, so we would text back and forth late at night comparing notes. I will miss talking about trashy TV with her.

Sandy Ho: The ways in which Alice's advocacy has influenced the sector are many, but among them includes the ways in which it is important that, when foundations and funders are making decisions, people with disabilities and disability communities are a part of their understanding of what is social justice.

Ryan Easterly: Alice was very effective in helping people understand the power of storytelling, the need for authentic sharing of stories and experiences, and embracing online advocacy. 

As Alice was the former Board Vice President at WITH, her influence is apparent in my work. The WITH Foundation is a healthcare funder that supports comprehensive healthcare for adults with developmental disabilities within the U.S. Storytelling is an important tool, and helping adults with intellectual disabilities share their own experiences is particularly useful in how we advance inclusive medical education curriculums. Alice will be a constant reminder that philanthropy and grantmaking are strengthened when you engage people with disabilities as leaders in the process, in decision-making positions. She was also a champion of our self-advocate advisory committee, who are co-decision makers in our grantmaking. 

Sandy Ho: Alice was not just a voice, and her advocacy and activism were not just something for this current moment that we are in. But she, as a disabled oracle, her work lit the way for the future and ensures disabled people will be a part of the future. 

Ryan Easterly: At her core, Alice wanted all people with disabilities to know their existence matters and that if society listens and learns from the experiences of disabled people, it will result in a better existence and better future for everyone.